Thursday, June 15, 2006

If anyone knows Brian Pederson, please urge him to get some help (and stop emailing me)

I've gotten a lot of terrific letters regarding The Dogs Who Found Me. And then I got this email, which I mistakenly responded to. Now the guy won't leave me alone. If anyone knows a Brian Pederson in Nevada, this is what he spends him time with. And for those who may not have read my book, I actually say that all dogs bite, not that pit bulls don't. UGH:

From: yellowfrog@gbis.com
To: dogswhofoundmeATgmail.com
Date: Jun 5, 2006 6:30 PM
Subject: you're TOO into dogs!

Ken Foster, I just finished reading The Dogs Who Found Me. Gee, you are SO into dogs. I half expected you to write that you'd rather be a dog than a person so you could have sex with your dog. You gush so much about loving dogs, you celebrate "anniversaries", they sleep in your bed. If you love dogs so much, why don't you marry one????

You wrote that your life would fall apart if you were ever dogless. Seriously?? Get a wife and kids, man, and you'll see how trivial dogs really are!

You wrote that when a pitbull bites a person and tastes human blood, it automatically knows it's doing wrong. Well please explain why a pair of loose pitbulls mauled the ears and face off a little boy who was out riding his new bicycle. Please explain another case of death by pitbulls when the animals KILLED the owner's boy. Apparently the stupid beasts were mating and they attacked the poor boy when he happened to enter the room. Of course, bleeding hearted pitbull saps rallied around the vicious beasts.

All this time you spend being concerned about dogs and wasting money at places like Three Dog Bakery could be spent helping people. You could be a Big Brother to a needy child. You could help kids to read, or teach illiterate adults to read. You could volunteer your time helping your own kind instead of these lower species, ugly dogs. Are you a misanthrope?

Did you know that a dog couldn't care less who its owner is? A trainer told a dog owner who thought the animal would pine away in his absence that the dog would forget he walked the earth in under a week if given sausage and steak by a new owner.

Brian

12 comments:

Cynical Girl said...

At least he paid $$ for your book.

someone paranoid said...

finally,
someone with the courage to say what we've all been thinking

kfoz said...

Cynical, unfortunately, he got the book at the library, and returned it, which is why he couldn't check to see if I was telling the truth about what I actually said.

Someone Paranoid, you're an ass. But we knew that already. I just don't know why you didn't sign your real name. I guess its all that charity work and family committments. Ha.

kfoz said...

I should add that I think the idea that he supposedly got the book from the library is pretty funny.

And also, that "Someone Paranoid" is my formerly trustworthy friend Case. You can read all about his new life at www.eyeonnola.blogspot.com

buffylv said...

It makes you wonder how he has time to write you so often, when he is doing so much work for his species, whatever that is.

Also, isn't it kind of strange that he would take caring for animals to wanting to have sex with them. I'm a little frightened of that statement. LOL

jennifer w. said...

I guarantee Brian Pederson in Nevada doesn't have a wife or a kid or a single friend, human or animal. What a troll.

Linda B. said...

Ah, it just goes to show...no matter where you go, no matter what you do, no matter what you survive or how many dogs you rescue or how many friends you have, no matter how good life can be or how much good karma you have ... there will always be an a**hole to rain on your parade.

Hmmm ... could BP actually be a follower of Bill O'Reilly, who equated marriage between homosexuals with marriage between humans and goats?

Ken, if you do plan to marry one of your dogs, at least marry Sula or Zephyr. I mean, interspecies marriage is one thing -- but an interspecies AND homosexual marriage with Brando???? Surely the apocalypse would not be far behind.... ;-)

Pat said...

Poor Brian....he thinks he's better than you because he cares about people? I'm with your other poster - I bet he doesn't have anyone in his life. If he really were a nice person, he'd realize that there are enough problems in the world that it's ok to pick one of them and try to help. He shouldn't be denigrating anyone's efforts to make a difference.

Anita said...

Hey Ken, 9+ mos of sleuthing around the web for dogs lost from Katrina has made me a pretty decent little spy. "Brian" is actually April Pederson, a free- lance "artist" from Nevada. Here's her little home on the web along with a photo:
http://www.virtualportmeirion.com/april/index.htm

So when are you coming to Philly to do a reading and doggie event?

jennifer w. said...

Ahahahahaha! Good work Anita! Ahahahaha!

Brian Pederson (a different one) said...

Ewww... and to think I have the same name as this guy. Except I live in Wisconsin. But this Brian guy sounds like a real nut job.

Anonymous said...

Good work Anita. See just looks like a freak! She obviously has nothing better to do with her time, except e-mail long drawn out letters of BS. Why did she even bother to read the book anyway? Idiot!! Ken I loved the book, you're awesome! Keep em coming!